Home is...

I was looking for an old document, browsing the contents of 3.5" floppy disks (remember those?) from my undergrad days (six or so years ago) and I came across my contributions to a group project for a speech and communication class I was taking at the time. For the project my group created a magazine of sorts with the theme being "home."

For my contributions to magazine I surveyed a class of high school English students I was working with then, simply asking them: "what does home mean to you?" I also wrote a poem and a little piece of pure fiction "attempting" to illustrate mainstream, almost cliche' notions of home as deviant, out of the ordinary things.

Here are those contributions, aged nearly a decade and cutting through two centuries, twentieth and twenty-first. (I have a tendency to dramatize things, haha) I amuse myself. Well, 30 year old Philip is amused by early 20's Philip. And maybe early 20's Philip is influencing 30 year old Philip.! Funny how that works!?

I hope you, too are amused by this.

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SURVEY:

High Schooler’s Thoughts on Home

“Home is the only place I can go to the bathroom #2” –Vicente Ramos

“Home is your definition of sanctum, sanctorum or just where you live for a while.” –Chris Ross

“Home = BED, KITCHEN, & BATHROOM” –Carlos Ranola III

“Home is where you watch and read ’special‘ things.” –Hitesh Patel

“Home is your special sanctuary.” –Dharma Sudjaja

“Home = a place where you stay when you got no where else to go.” –Christine Flores

“Cuddled up in bed w/ candles on, watching a late movie is home to me.” –Deanna Catchatooriani

“A place where you live and sleep” –Jonathan Hui

“A place where you live.” --Marlon

“Home is my ‘Champagne Room’.” –Colleen Riordan

“People.”—Irene

“Home = a place where I can relax and just chill with my family.” –Maryangel Morales

“Home is where the heart is” –Jovani Roa, “J”

“Home, somewhere to go to and has someone who loves you for you and not for something else.” –Jenn D.

“Home is where I sleep and do my work and use my computer.” –Justin Wong

“A place where I get to sleep . . .” –Rac???

“Home = is where I feel comfortable at.” –Mike Uy

“HOME = A PLACE WHERE I CAN DO ANYTHING, AND WHERE ALL MY THINGS ARE.” –Jillian Livelo

“Smell of cooking, a warm place to stay, full of love so I won’t runaway.” –Tarna Kessler

“SLEEP!” Jenilee Malibiran

“LOVE, SUPPORT, AND RELAXATION IS WHAT HOME MEANS TO ME” –Maya Castro

“A place to sleep and relax.” –M.H.

“Home is a place to sleep at night because that is all I do there.” –Jacklyn Rudoni

“A place to go to find someone who will always love you and care for you.” –Vanessa Sherry

“A warm place where you can get away from everything.” –Elizabeth Holguin

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POEM:

a lonely place-- morse code consciousness

By pHILIP Payumo Jucaban

IN

out of my hand
the sound of a green glass bottle
rolling on the concrete.

on my back
the rigid pavement
ice. my soul . . .

through my eyes
a blurry vision of yellow street
lights amidst a black sky, blurry.

in my nerves,
numb-tingling dizziness
spinning stanza 3.

out of place,
my mind,
my wife’s home.

in my mouth
a desert
empty sand.

out of my hands,
my life,
my home.

in my nose
the musty scent of
belches undiscovered

out of my hand,
on my back,
through my eyes,
in my nerves,
in my mouth,
in my nose,
out of my hands.

spinning stanza 3
i go to black.

OUT

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FICTION:

Story of My Many Homes

Home is: where you sleep, cook, clean, bathe; a place you put a "WELCOME" Mat in front of; where the heart is, where people come to visit you; a place where you are comfortable; home is family; home is a place you keep coming back to...

By pHILIP Payumo Jucaban

Anywhere. I sleep outside on the grass in front of the Humanities Building at SF State. I cook and BBQ at Golden Gate Park; can you smell the sweet meat?. As a waiter, I clean the tables at the new Golden Wok restaurant in Chinatown.

One day Chow Mein noodles were dangling on my forearm as I walked to the back room. My boss yelled at me for being too slow, so I threw a Chow Mein noodle at him.

Another day I took a bath in Lake Merced, drove to Half Moon Bay naked, then rolled in the hay of Half Moon Bay to dry off. Then I went to Haight & Ashbury and took a Shit in the middle of the street.

There is a WELCOME Mat in front of the grocery store.
My heart is in my Chest, slightly to the left.
After hitting a Home Run, Barry Bonds hugs his son.

My friends visit me in the hospital with Half Moon Bay Hay stuck up deep in my nose. Soon after the police come in my room, yank the hay out of my nose and throw handcuffs on my wrists.

I am comfortable in my cell in San Quentin Jail, three days after being arrested for Indecent Exposure at Lake Merced, Defecating on Public Property on Haight Street and Assault With a Deadly Weapon at New Golden Wok in Chinatown.

My family lives with me in jail, brother in D-block, my Mom in C-block and my Dad is the prison guard. They let me out of Jail after a year, but I keep on coming back.

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Home is: where you sleep, cook, clean, bathe; a place you put a "WELCOME" Mat in front of; where the heart is, where people come to visit you; a place where you are comfortable; home is family; home is a place you keep coming back to...


Home is... the act of looking back and laughing...

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